Confessions of a Wino

Back to reality, with tonight’s University Challenge yielding less than 5 points to the Wino intellect (or lack of).  And this despite a dumbing down of questions this series, to include word games, “modern” music and, of all things, 20th century architecture.

My lack of success at quiz events is partly due to lack of knowledge, and partly due to lack of due care and attention.  I think they named a driving offence after me.  But there must be some random knowledge stored up there in the old grey matter.  For example, I am sure I heard that the wines of Margaux are feminine and gently perfumed.

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Super trouper.  No, not a huge stage light illuminating Anni-Frid’s gorgeous pupils.  Not a 1960′s smog over London.  Not even a receptacle for doggie-doos (or is that a pooper scooper?)

None of the above.  Just my thoughts on the first 2005 Gevrey Chambertin I can remember tasting.

This Gevrey is top notch for a mere £20.99 from the Sunday Times Wine Club.

OK, that is far from cheap but I think it is worth it.  Bright as a button with forest fruits, hay and meringue, it is a veritable farmyard pavlova.

Didn’t last long…..

According to Haircut 100 in the 1980′s, my favourite shirt was “on the bed”, but it didn’t encourage me to do a somersault on my head.

Another musical/clothing misnomer came from Scottish warbler, Paolo Nutini who extolled the virtues of new shoes.  I think most readers will agree that old shoes are infinitely superior.  Only Oliver Sweeney makes mens’ shoes that fit quickly but they are bloody expensive.  Most Northampton based shoemakers require a 3 month run in period and an oil change.  Other brands simply expire within that period.

So we are left with our old favourites.  Comfortable and reassuring.  Loyal friends, whose passing we mourn like a childhood pet.

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And so Eurovision has come and gone and, for once, the UK didn’t come last.  In fact we made a creditable 5th place, although we had to recruit the noble Lord Webber of Musicals to write us a tune and, predictably, the singer had to come from a reality TV show.

Some have criticised Eurovision in recent years alleging tactical voting as being the cause of the UK’s fall from grace.  I say our entries were just pap and wouldn’t have troubled the scorer in a hitting a barn door with a banjo competition.

Highly variable results is something you get used to when you drink Burgundy.  Was Jean Grivot Nuits-St-Georges Les Lavières 2004 a “Waterloo” or did it score null points?

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I’m not having much luck with my latest Burgundies from the Wine Society.  This one would have cost £24.25 if it had not been included in a cheapo Burgundy bin end case.  The 2004 is available at £28.50 – maybe that is a better bet now?

The 2001 I opened the other evening was slightly oxidised but there was clear evidence of a super wine under the dull acidity.

Apple and blackberry, raspberry and ginger.  It tipped a good nod to Pinot Noir with the smell you get when you chuck damp leaves on a fire.  It wasn’t so badly oxidised as to make it undrinkable but a £25 Nuit St-Georges like this should have had me in ecstasy rather than objectivity.  Shame.

Is the Sony brand dead?

I used to be a Sony snob – hifi, TVs, Playstations, Walkmans.  OK I admit I never had a Betamax, but I know early adopter friends who did.  In the 1970s our household was the first in the street with a colour TV.  In the 1980s we were last to invest in VHS technology, albeit by virtue of Radio Rentals and with a third of my first adult weekly paycheque as a deposit.

I am currently watching a Sony TV from the 1990s which is fab. I also own a Sony TV from 2007 that is total tosh – picture quality, software, remote control - all about as user-friendly as a Doberman shaped perambulator.

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This may be made from M. Burguet’s favourite old vines but I am not that impressed.

The first bottle I opened was cloudy as a January day in Manchester (any day in January, take your pick) and as bitter as a teaspoonful of chicory essence – remember that wartime coffee substitute?  No I don’t either.

The second bottle wasn’t cloudy but failed to live up to its price tag of £26 from the cyber-shelves of the Wine Society.

I will give the second bottle the benefit of my detox tainted palate, but I will be writing to Messrs Johnson and co to get my £25.95 back for the first.

For the record it was a little soapy although had a few redeeming flavours of radishes and Eton Mess.  I would expect more from a £7.50 bottle of Chilean Pinot.

I guess it’s a bit early to be drinking 2005 Gevrey, but I am an impatient man.  My father’s death taught me never to put things off, especially if they are things you might enjoy.  As the old saying goes, if you do it today and you like it, you can do it again tomorrow.

You might think it trite to apply this logic to a bottle of wine but having the patience of a sinner is my cross to bear.  I am the curious cat with tannin stained whiskers.  The Kentucky Fried Chambertin.  The Blackberry addict who switched to Apple too soon.  The oenological antithesis to Mother Theresa, at so many levels.  And anyway, I ordered half a case, so I can do it again tomorrow if I feel like it.

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Remembrance Sunday (and Tuesday) saw me observing a total of five minutes of silence – that’s a miracle I hear you cry!  The first two at the anointed hour of 11a.m. Sunday, somewhat bizarrely, in a queue at our local Tesco store, the third at the Man City vs Spurs game, and the fourth and fifth driving across the Pennines on Tuesday morning listening to the Ken Bruce Show.

It’s amazing how time flies.  I remember about 1976 when I first commemorated the war dead.  I never imagined I would still be here 32 years later.

Château Soutard has a recommended drink by date of 2040.  I am certainly not going to wait and see if I live another 32 years to try the first bottle of the case I bought en-primeur from somewhere at about £21 per bottle.  St Emilion wines being mostly Merlot (in this case 70%) compared to the rougher, and tougher when young, Cabernet Sauvignon, are generally more approachable in youth so I was determined not to die before I sampled the Soutard.

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I’ve held my tongue for a while.  I don’t want to sound like yet another whinger that told you so, but I was never in favour of Mark Hughes being appointed manager of Man City.  I admit that I reneged on my promise to turn up at the first game of this season and shout the Sven mantra.  I actually turned up at Eastlands yesterday to see Man City suffer a humiliating 2-1 defeat to Tottenham Hotspur, albeit after some questionable refereeing and grim Manchester weather.

But whilst luck and refereeing even out over a season, we have a number of more fundamental weaknesses.  Dunne is looking disastrous, Vassell is just not in the same class as his team-mates, Zabaleta still has to convince me he is even close to Corluka who left for Spurs in August.  Worryingly I hear rumours that Hughes’ intentions of splashing the Abu Dhabi cash in the January transfer window are targeted at a handful of his Blackburn ex-employees.  The ones who helped him reach the astonishing heights of mid table obscurity, admittedly at low cost.

Sometimes, though, if you have the money, you need to aim a bit higher.  I am not exactly rich so it was a stretch for me to fork out £21 to the Wine Society for this Kanzem Altenberg Alte Reben Riesling Spätlese, von Othegraven, 2007 from the Mosel.  A mouthful in every sense…

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